(NO)Dead Ends

It was one of those days.

The hard kind when my deep pleading prayers don't feel like

they are getting any answers, and personal revelation is silent.

There are deadlines relentlessly pounding at the door, and peace 

seems entirely out of reach.

I question all the decisions and the pathways that got me to where I am

today, wondering if they were the right ones

and if they will help me and my family move forward and progress.

Did we turn the wrong way?

Are we at a dead end?

Somedays, I question.

I don't question the Lord and His power and miracles.

I've seen too many of those in my life to wonder.

I know He's capable of anything and everything.

But I wonder if I've used up too many of the miracles,

and he's tired of me asking and pleading.

Claire shared with me a story from Elder Holland:

"He expects us to pray and trust and be believing,
and not give up, and not panic, and not retreat, and not jump ship,
when something doesn't seem to be going just right.
We stay in, we keep working, we keep believing, keep trusting,
following that same path, and we will live to fall in His arms
and feel His embrace and hear Him say, 
"I told you that it'd be okay.
I told you it would be alright."

Those words touched me, 

tomorrow is another day, and I'll wake up like I do every morning,

but I can have peace knowing that He'll NEVER abandon me.

Or my family.

He will never give up on us.

I need to be still and wait.

When we make decisions, God expects us to pray and 
then trust Him—not give up, panic, or “jump ship.”

With God, there are no dead ends.

This evening, Christian and I drove around town with the

windows down in silence.

It was good silence.

Thinking silence.

We drove to a spot we like to visit because we have a dream

at this spot, and we like to talk about it as if it were happening.

And at the end of the day, I pulled out a delicious

can of COCONUT DR. PEPPER (it's amazing),

and saw a message on my phone that Jane had sent me

 that we are officially halfway to Halloween.

The Lord knows I love both of those things and maybe that's my

sign that He loves me and that He knows our situation.

Maybe He's telling me it's ok.

Yes, it's going to be ok.

There's A Snake In The Hytte

It happened after lunch...

I went to the Hytte to gather our ladies' eggs.

However, when I put my head inside the hutch this time, I didn't see eggs.

Instead, I saw something black.

And for some reason (habit), I put my hand inside to gather the eggs

(WHYYY DID I DO THAT?)

As soon as I realized that what I was feeling was not eggs, 

my hand was already inside, feeling around.

I WAS TOUCHING A SUPER GROSS, SCARY BLACK SNAKE!

Did you hear me?  

I SAID A SNAKE!!!!

I screamed, slammed the Hytte hatch shut, and fell to my knees,

gathering strength to run away.

I mean, I was dead.

I'm sorry if I sound dramatic, but the thought of my hand inside

 TOUCHING the snake was 

playing and replaying in my head over and over and over again.

It was like a bad dream.

AND NOW I DON'T CARE IF I AM BEING OVERLY DRAMITIC!

IT WAS HORRIBLE.

Christian came outside with his welding gloves

and gun and took care of the snake, who,

 BTW ATE FIVE EGGS!

FIVE!!

EGGS!!!

RIP: me

Cinco de Mayo Sunday

Every year on Cinco de Mayo, I make my signature Mexican Chocolate Cake, 

and we usually eat out for Mexican food.

  This year, Cinco de Mayo happened to fall on a Sunday, so 

we stayed home to eat, and unfortunately

 I forgot to check my pantry on Saturday to ensure that

 I had all the necessary ingredients for making the cake and the dinner.

And sadly, when it was time to make the cake, 

I couldn't make the delicious frosting for the top.

The reality is that I was the only one who cared since

 I'm the only frosting fan in the family.

But EVERYONE cared that we only had six tortillas for burritos.

Plus, to make it even more disappointing, 

 it was Fast Sunday, which meant that we were all

super hungry!

On a spiritual side note:

Our family fasted together with one purpose for a

very significant and sensitive thing.

We believe in miracles and God's power.

We have faith in His timing and will.

And sometimes IT IS SO HARD to be still and wait.

After dinner, we took a walk in the fields, checked on the cows,

and watched as the sun lowered and the humidity took over the fields.

Jane and Christian walked through the fields with Angus

who jumped around the tall grass like a little puppy.

The rest of us (who were not wearing boots) did not.

It's tick season.  

That would be a death wish.

Chicken Festival

Each year, our town of Siler City holds a "Chicken Festival." 

hosted by Mountaire Farms.

Mountaire Farms has a huge chicken plant downtown Siler, and this festival brings

out just about everyone for a fun Southern small-town gathering.

Christian jumped on this opportunity and got a booth to represent

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and

along with the full-time missionaries serving in the area, 

we distributed otter pops and copies of The Book of Mormon.

We provided information about who we are and 

where we meet for our Sunday services.

I helped Christian come up with and create ideas for 

 giant posters for the missionaries to hold 

to introduce our faith...kind of a 'Meet the Mormons' type feel.

On one poster, we added scriptures and asked people to decide if it came from 

The Book of Mormon or the Bible.

We also compiled a list of the top 20 questions that people search 

on Google about Mormons like, are Mormons Christian (YES), 

and do Mormon men have more than one wife (NO!).

It was a great way to mostly dispel some weird stuff people

think about members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

The missionaries were so fearless and adorable, 

and I got a huge lump in my throat the whole time thinking about

my missionary, my Elder Nielson.

 Man, I miss that boy!

He'd be fearless, too.

The best part of the festival was when our missionaries got to perform 

with up-and-coming Jordan Pickett, a home-grown country star.

Jordan wrote a beautiful song called Faith, Hope, & Love.

It was a perfect song to sing with our faithful, God-loving missionaries!

Last month, Christian messaged Jordan on every social media platform he had 

to see if he would be willing to sing a song with the missionaries. 

He was so cool and said yes.

They practiced at our church and really nailed the performance!

You can watch the performance HERE.

ALL IN

 Friday! Yay!  Welcome!  

Today was Claire's day off, so we decided to hit a Barre class together

then we quickly rushed back home because our friend Morgan Jones Pearson,

who is the host of the popular podcast All In, interviewed us for

a special Mother's Day episode.

I love this podcast because Morgan interviews people who share their feelings on

what it means to be ALL IN the gospel of Jesus Christ.

(Morgan recently interviewed coach Andy Reid, and it was fire.)

Morgan asked us about the accident, especially Claire's perspective, and

she was eloquent and clear with her words and descriptions

of what she remembers and has gained from her experiences.

I was so touched.

We also talked about our relationship as mother/daughter.

But, she's more my bestie.

Later, after school, (and a nap), Claire took Jane and Lod to the mall.

(For posterity's sake, Jane HATES HATES shopping).

But they did what sisters do together and had fun,

I mean, they came home happy (and with treats).

You can listen to our podcast HERE.

Haircuts All Around

After school, Lottie and I took to the swing to relax before the dinner shift

where, once again, she begged me to let her cut her hair.

I've been saying no because she has such beautiful, thick red hair

and I feel like it should be long.

She adamantly disagrees.

I was that grade-schooler with the short hair.

For some reason, I kept cutting my hair super short because

I thought cutting my hair would make me look like Demi Moore in Ghost.

I ended up looking more like Dorothy Hamill in 1980 something.

I was a scrawny 11-year-old who was often mistaken for a boy, and

I often regret that period of my life.

It wasn't until puberty hit IN HIGH SCHOOL, did I feel

confident with short hair.

But the truth is, Lottie has lots of confidence and is very comfortable

in the way she looks and acts.

It's refreshing and inspiring.

And hair grows.

So I set up an appointment for next week.

Also, I scheduled a haircut for Gigs, too!!!!!!!!

We've been looking for options:

He's not super jazzed about a haircut, but it's SOO time.

Angus, you're next!

A & B

 Wednesdays are my favorite days because:

A. I get to watch Lottie at horse lessons. 

She is adorable, and I can see her confidence shining out 

as she learns to control her horse.  

I see it in her body language. It's really cool.

I'm so proud of her. 

 Today, her instructor, Megan, asked her if she'd like to try her lesson

using a Western saddle.

I think Christian was more excited about her as a Western cowgirl,

 but she said she preferred her English style.

(I do, too, Lod!)

B. Jane is at home making dinner while we're at horse lessons.

As I mentioned before, she's cooking through her Pinterest board.

She has years' worth of food and recipes she's pinned, and she's finally

cooking now that she has a little more time in her life.

Tonight, we had a really yummy salad and veggie skillet pancakes

with some kind of delicious orange sauce.

(I need to get official names from her to do it justice).

And that's why Wednesdays are the best.

Why Did The Turtle Cross The Road?

 This morning, as Jane and I pulled up from Barre, 

Jane opened the door to get out, and Muppet, 

our hen jumped right into her lap.  

We had a good laugh. 

Later, on my way home after picking up Lottie from school, 

I was probably driving at 60 mph

 when I almost hit a slow-moving turtle that was crossing the road. 

It's turtle season, which means we see a lot of turtles wandering around 

looking for food or places to lay eggs. 

Unfortunately, we also come across a lot of turtles that have been hit by cars. 

I stopped my car, backed up, opened the door, and rescued the turtle. 

Lottie was thrilled and named him Marcus. 

I told Lottie that she could play with Marcus until sunset, 

and then she would have to let him go. 

She spent the whole afternoon feeding him and building him a house 

using sticks and flowers. 

At dinner, she took him near the pond behind the

 house and set him free. Marcus wandered off into the wild. 

As I kissed Lottie goodnight, she told me that she had 

written her name on Marcus' shell using a Sharpie 

so that she would know him if he ever came back to visit.

I really hope he does.

The Best House In The World

 We didn't have school today because of a teacher work day.
So, Gigs flew his drone around the house, including in Claire's room 
to bug her while she had a little nap before her 12-hour shift at the hospital.
She was thrilled.

Later, Lottie and I sat on the couch and laughed at stuff,

watched a few Mr. Beast videos on my phone, and then we finally got

 ourselves up and drove to the store, where she 
talked me into buying her ANOTHER Squishmallow stuffed animal thing.

She's still so obsessed with those things.

On the way home, she said to me,

"Mom, I love you so much.  I have the best life!

I have a Mom and Dad who love me so much,

we live in this cool place,

we have money to buy groceries, and I'm happy."

I thought my heart would burst.

We've been super conservative with our activities lately

while we pray that BovIQ/work sees better days.

So our days off of school usually look like hanging around the house,

working in the yard, watching movies upstairs, family walks around the farm,

epic wiffle ball games, car drives, and motorcycle rides around Stillestead.

 

As I went to bed tonight, there were 12 dollar bills

laying on my pillow with a sticky note and a drawing 

of her newest Squishmallow with a bubble chat 

coming out above her head saying:

"This is money for buying me and bringing

 me home to the best house in the world."

Sundee Best

While Claire was in Ghana, she had skirts and ties made for us. 

Today, we all wore them to church and matched fantastically!

Then we had an epic family whiffle ball match on the front lawn

and I laughed so hard.

I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.