Forgetting Friday

(me out and about-looking very tired)

I thought today was Tuesday.
All day.
Why would I think today was Tuesday?
Medications?
Loss of oxygen during surgery?
Early on-set of Alzheimer's?
All of the above?
You know, my Nana had Alzheimer's and died from it.

Nevertheless, I am still alive and moving even if today in my heart it's Tuesday.
I was so happy when I was told that today is Friday, because Mom, Lucy, and Bets are coming on Sunday. So soon!!

Mr. Nielson said I needed to get out today.
So I did.
I hobbled to the car armed with pillows and nestled in.
I brought a magazine to read while he shopped at Trader Joes.
But I didn't end up reading it, I talked to Page on the phone instead.

I was nervous someone would crash into us and I couldn't protect myself since I am a weakling. I get really nervous these days...it's the medication-so they say.
I asked Mr. Nielson if he thought it was weird that I thought today was Tuesday.
He said no.
He said no, because I "have been saying a lot worse."
Like one time, I thought he was the president of the United States,
which is so weird because Mr. Nielson is not a fan of Mr. President.

Excuse me, I need to write some questions to my Doc's:

To my Dr's. J and L,

My hump hurts my back. I know you know that. My legs and feet look like cabbage patch dolls. Is that normal?
Do you think I could be a good candidate for the circus? (You know with my hump and all.) Could I be the 8th wonder of the world?
I need to clip my fingernails because all I do is scratch myself all day. Is it normal to scratch myself silly? I need a pair of gloves. What do you suggest? Is it normal to forget things?
Is it normal to think that today was Tuesday?
Will I die?

Lovingly,
Stephanie.

And that's what I'd say. Happy Friday...Wow today is Friday.
Time sure flies when your having so much fun!!

Kisses,
Nie.

P.S.

Katja is still sick too. Yuck!

check it out here.

My Day yesterday aka:boring post.

My Day:

6:00: in pain.-wake up Mr. Nielson to get me some pills.
6:15: Boys are awake. I am too, but I don't move because that hurts
7:00 : With his hair sticking up all over, Mr. Nielson pops the pills down my throat with warm cherry Gatorade. He hobbles back to his bed.
7:05: Mr. Nielson discovers that Nicholas wet the bed.
7:15: Boys up and I can hear Grandpa Russ making breakfast.-
"Oliver do you want milk or juice......Ollie, what do you-hey stop hurting your brother and come here and tell me what you want".
7:30: Girls go to school early so they can be tutored. They have really needed some help since switching schools.
8:00: Mr. Nielson brings me toast and eggs for breakfast. He begins preparing for my 2 hour dressing change. Pads, medicine's, wraps, bandages and ointment's are laid out nicely on my bed.
9:35 : Dressed, hair combed, teeth brushed, and now I am exhausted!
9:56: Back to bed.
12:45 Lunch at the kitchen table. Today is Mary's homemade vegetable soup and warm toast.
1:00: I received a huge basket full of goodies from Kristin...totally cheers me up.
1:05: Eat a homemade oreo's-yum
2:30: Christian puts me back to bed. Sleeping (on my side...ouch) Then he goes out to run some errands. He came home prepped with some serious exercise equipment...(yoga mat)
3:30: The cub scouts come over for their activity. Mary makes sweetrolls, I find myself in the kitchen for one (or two) when the boys go home.
4:00: Package arrives on doorstep-more goodies. I am instantly happy!!
4:30: Ms. Jones comes over. I cry. I love her so much, and her children are so darling. I feel jealous of her lovely life. She takes Jane and Claire to play.
5:00: Back to bed with pills.
6:30: Shop online for Betsy, found some darling things. Lucy, Andrew, Bets, and my Mom are coming to Mesa on Sunday. I couldn't be happier.
7:00 Christian reveals his present for Oliver (a late birthday gift)...a new bike. He is in LOVE.
8:00 Hobble around my room organizing and crying in pain.
9:00: Put kids to bed.
9:15: Sit in the kitchen eating with Mr. Nielson. We talk about what we are going to do tomorrow. He says he is going to take Jane on a date, go to the dry cleaners, bank and store.
I tell him I am going to my bed.
I feel sorry for myself.
10:00: Catch tid bits of the State of the Union.
11:30: Blogging and nodding my sleepy head.
Now: Bed.

Do you want to see more of Ollie? Go here.
How about some cupcakes...yum go here.

We call him Hunchie

(for you vance, we will call him hunchie)

Today has been hard.

My legs hurt.
My feet are swollen-think cabbage patch doll feet.
My back aches.
and
I am grumpy.

Mr. Nielson (bless his heart) shower's me everyday, and today he was extra gentle because I was awfully weepy. My back hurts so much. Yesterday I went to get my hunchback (shall we name him hunchie) blown up with more saline. Dr. Jensen's wife sent me a necklace-I wore it all day yesterday. It is of me and Mr. Nielson kissing-in happier days.

I love all the support given to me!!! It is making this whole ordeal much easier.
My wish came true yesterday when I got home from the hospital and there on the front porch were a bag full of sweet cake oreo's...wow wow wow. Hold the phone! I was so excited!

Things I am thankful for today:

Target large flannel shirts
Hot showers
Kristin A--i love the basket
Mail
Valentines Day is coming
GrandMary's sweet rolls.

The Godparents visit, and another letter to Dr. L. and a list

(Andrew, baby Coco, Jane, Claire, Ollie, Reachel, Nic)

Do you ever feel sorry for yourself...like I do? (all the time)
A very silly thing really, it gets you no where.

So when the Godparents came over last night with Coco looking like she and her parents stepped out of a posh NYC boutique.
Coco had on a vintage inspired romper and a bonnet that you would only find in the 20's.
She was sound asleep on her daddies lap while he played with her hands.
It was a beautiful site to see, and so adorable !

Her deep set brown eyes and high check-bones define this Bagley baby-beautiful.

I couldn't keep my eyes off her, and I did it again, I felt sorry for little 'ol me. Boo hoo!
I want a baby, so bad in fact that I could try it tomorrow-except that would hurt me really bad.

To put a fertile woman off should be crime.

Instead I gazed into her brown eyes and saw hope.

My children were all over Godmother Reachel, it felt good to see, just like the old days! Of course Godmother Reachel brought vintage bingo cards and candy, and whipped up some veggie Shepard's pie. Just to see Reachel smile was nice.

I feel sorry for myself a lot...and I know I shouldn't. Maybe just like for 2 more days? Then I will be better.

My open letter to the man-Dr. L. And his awesome friends (like Dr. J and Andrea)

On to the hospital for check-up #1.
They may possibly add more fluid in my hunch back so it will be bigger
and that much harder to put my hoodies on.

I sound like I am complaining,
so I better type the blessings of today:

1. Hope of Haiti cd

2. Prayer

3. Happy pills
4. Grape gatoraide
5 .Letterpress valentines I am sending out this year
6. Mini Boden.

Wishing I had a homemade Oreo cookie! I love those!

Now I am off to have Dr L. put me to sleep so he can take out my drain in my back in a calm and peaceful way, then I will wake up to 3 dozen roses, all diffrent colors and a nice tall glass of cold grape gatoraid.

AHHH, sounds too good to be true.(..because it is.)

A new list and my comeback

(me in happier days)

I am back.
Partly alive, but back.
Mr. Nielson did such a good job taking over my blog.

So...pretty much I just kick it in bed all day, and it's hard.
My once active life has been transformed into slow days in which I just take it minute by minute.
My children fly around me doing this and that, and all I can do is muster up enough energy to remember this is just temporary.
Claire and Jane are out the door each morning to school.
Ollie and Nicholas play around the house with GrandMary's toys.
The set-up here really is delightful, and I am in such good hands.
I just miss home.
I miss me.

I live in the place where it all began.
A boy.
A marriage.
Children.
A move.
A plane crash.
And now I am here again for surgery and a hunchback (which will magically turn into a neck)
I take so much medications and have heartburn from the antibiotic's.
My showers are comparable to someone scrubbing me raw until it bleeds.
Stephanie + shower= my wish that I had passed on to the other side.

And yet, I move forward forgetting the past and preparing for the future. Whatever that is.
I just ordered like a thousand dollars worth of hoodies because that is all that works over this big back of mine.

Sleeping is the worst, with 2 huge lumps on my back, I sleep on my side with pillows propped up against my back, and I wake up in pain, crying out for the life I once led.

My donor site is so tender and I itch like I have poison ivy all over my pale skin.
I hate to complain, but this is harder than I thought.


Next week Mom and Lucy are coming, I will look forward to that.

I heard it snowed in Utah, and to think that just today I hobbled outside and picked me a fresh orange off the trees.
Even in the midst of pain and suffering, the Lord always reminds me that life is a gift-no matter the condition.

Things I am grateful for today:
On-line shopping
Comfortable bed
Darling children
Tums
Baby wipes (don't ask why)
Pain medications
Dr. L.
Mr. Nielson

I need your prayers (again, and again) Thanks
-Nie

Retrofitting the tub

Today's goal was to give Stephanie a bona fide shower/bath...not the "in-bed-sponge-baths" that you get at the hospital, but a real shower. Here's what I rigged up for my girl so she could sit and enjoy the event (enjoy might not be the right word).

A little redwood from Home Depot, a few stainless steel screws, and gardening pads to make it soft. And it smells good too.

Love Mr. Nielson

Recovering At Home

She's home!

And the Arizona rain and stormy weather is a bonus.

Today we are going to figure out how to get her into the shower.

Love, Mr. Nielson

The mural

(...yes, that's a sailor cap on Ollie's head)

Tuesday we had a little "dinner in the waiting room" appointment with Stephanie. Key elements included: Cafe Rio take-out, turns pushing the wheelchair around the hospital, and the Burn Center mural.

(mixed basket of emotions associated with this mural)

We are all hoping Stephanie gets to be discharged tomorrow. It is conditional around being able to control her pain levels with oral medicine. She is such a sweetheart. I love this woman!

(practicing our escape for tomorrow)

Love, Mr. Nielson

Fish for good behavior

This is what Sunday morning looked like this weekend...some happy to go to church...some not so much.

Grandmary offered the girls a 28-cent pet goldfish if they would keep their room clean everyday while we are staying at their house.

I'm sure they will name them something awesome.

Stephanie is doing well. We hope she will be discharged this week and do the rest of her recovery at home with the us. And take back control of her blog.

Oh I love her...

Love, Mr. Nielson

Wild Things

This was last night's gift from the children to their mommy as I was pulling out of the driveway to go to the hospital: Wild Thing Shadow art - headlights and the garage door.

Stephanie was in good spirits. We watched a little TV (Jay Leno) in her hopital room. There were moments where she and I were laughing so hard that it hurt and the nurses came running in wondering if she was ok. It was good to see her laugh...even when it hurts.

Love, Mr. Nielson

Speaking of books...

For those of you who requested a copy of NieNie's favorite book, it's on its way to you...finally!

Sorry it took so long.

Stephanie is in the OR right now as I write this. More skin grafts as planned.

This book brings me peace.

Love, Mr. Nielson

A Story To Tell

Each night I read to Stephanie. It is calming for her to here a familiar voice and helps her slip away into dreamland. I remember wanting the same thing done for me when I was sick. I usually continue reading out loud for a good hour after she falls asleep just to make sure she's comfortable for the night. It is so nice to be read to.

Last night when I came home from visiting Stephanie I found my Dad reading to the boys in bed. He read out of a book that his mom used to read to him in th 40's and 50's; true stories about "Growing Up", "Once Upon a Time" stories, "Pioneer Stories", "Holiday Time" stories.
We all have a story to tell...don't we.


Love, Mr. Nielson

Surger-nie Update #2

This morning, Oliver woke me up and said he wanted to play catch, as he clapped a Nerf football between his anxious paws...a little unusual for my boy who is usually one half Indiana Jones and the other half Jim Craig.


Ollie's the type of child who when he tells you something, there is a slide-show going on in his mind of how he envisions it to be. The huge half-toothed grin under his even bigger eager eyes told me there were some good pictures going on inside there.


I think it played out just as he hoped. Gigs on the other hand was content to watch on the sidelines and stuff his cheeks with "dough-durt and dernola" (yogurt and granola).

Stephanie is doing better today; progress everyday is what we see. She handles things so gracefully even while she's a patient in the ICU. Grace is one of her middle names. Oh I love her so much.

She's having another surgery before the week is over, and I'm hoping the best for her, as I'm sure you are too. Thank you.

Love, Mr. Nielson

Surger-nie Update #1

So......

Here's what's happening with NieNie.

She's back in the Maricopa Medical Center/AZ Burn Center for her first phase of surgeries. Everything went well in the OR on Thursday, but she's had some complications since then. She's stable now and will probably be here another week or so.


I'm dividing my time with Stephanie here at the hospital and the children at home. Everyday the children send me off to visit Stephanie, readied with hand drawings and other gifts, i.e. picked flowers and pet earth worms, from Grandmary's backyard.


Thank you so much to all of you who are thinking of and praying for my dear wife. She is the love of my life and I know that the power of prayer is real and it works. We are going to get through this thing.

Love, Mr. Nielson

Surgery in the sun.

Mr. Nielson and I packed up the family in the car and drove
miles and miles to make it to the sun.
We found it.
It was bright and warm, and I was still in my coat.
Then, I took it off and drove down the 101 with the windows down.
Why I am here is not so glamorous.
I am here for surgery.

Lots of it.

Reconstruction of my neck to be exact.
Oh, and tissue expanders in my back to stretch my skin.
(so basically, I will be Nie Nie the hunchback for about 2 months)
The tissue expanders will stretch my back skin for my new neck.

Its amazing what can be done! I am actually honored that I get to be a part of this fantastic medical world...I'd rather not, but since I am, I might as well be happy about it...right?

Mr. Nielson is taking over the blog while I lay in the hospital for the next week.
I could use your prayers....again....and....again.

I love you all

Kisses,
Nie

(somewhere between Utah and Arizona)

Mr. Nielson's top 10

2009 Top Moments with Mr. Nielson:

10. On cold mornings in Utah, Mr. Nielson would make a fire in our family room fireplace so the house would be warm when I woke up.

9. Mr. Nielson driving me up to Salt Lake City for doctor appointments.
He would play soft music in the car so I would be calm
and possibly catch a little nap in the car.
(I always did)

8. Singing me songs in bed when I was really sick.

7. Lots of Late night runs to Wallgreens for medical supplies.

6. Making waffles for me whenever I asked.
And, cutting up my food when my hands were sore (like his 5th child).

5. His gentle reminders that I would keep on getting better,
and life would again be filled with happiness.
(his was right)

4. One night, I read my two favorite children's books
-love stories- to him in bed before we went to sleep.
(here and here)

3. Mr. Nielson waking me up at 2:00 am to see the
dozens of deer in our front yard eating our apples.
It was a inspiring sight.

2. The beautiful poem he wrote me on Christmas morning.

1. Perfecting our kiss.
After the accident, it was odd, awkward and it hurt.
Now it is adorable.

Welcome 2010

Some of us were up all night long!


****
Introducing:

A new blog!!
I have started a new project.
Go here to check it out and follow me along this new adventure of mine.

DISCLAIMER:
it looks bad because my awesome blog designer is out of town.
So, proceed with care and know it will look Nie-worthy next week!

Kisses-
Nie.