The Girls Are Back In Town

My girls had a little adventure this weekend...their first experience flying (commercially) as unattended minors.


(gowned up girls)

I figured there would be a little apprehension about flying without a parent so I called the week before to calm any fears. But as I began explaining each step of what would happen, I detected more and more giggles of excitement on the other end of the line.

The flight went off without a hitch. They got the VIP treatment from the Southwest Crew. Claire later confessed all the things she and Jane imagined while they were flying...no parents around; first they were orphans, then they were adults, then they were two spoiled children getting shipped off to boarding school in England, etc.


(a visit after church on Sunday)

I love these girls. I'm glad to have all my chicks gathered 'round.

Stephanie had a tough weekend. She's been sad and in lots of pain and discomfort. The healing process has been lagging a little. Any positive vibes (prayers) you could send her way would be appreciated.

Love, Mr. Nielson


p.s. A call for advertisement - if you are interested in advertising with NieNie on nieniedialogues, or nie and you, or cuisine nie, please contact nienieads@yahoo.com

Special Rooms

Today Stephanie walked around the Burn Floor 4 times with PT-Deb on one arm and me on the other. Oh the laughs we had...seriously pretty funny.

As we passed by each room there were patients in some and not in others. But that's not what I would see as we walked by. My mind's eye would look back into the not so distant past when Stephanie or I was a patient in that room.

Each room holds a special, often sacred experience. Each room can be described by feelings that sound like me narrating a book...to myself: "this is the room where I woke up" or "this is the room I first saw Stephanie asleep in a coma", or "this is the room I learned to walk again".

Late last night as I left the Burn Center the spirit of one special room caught my mind. The door was open with no patient inside, room tidy, bed empty, sheets folded neatly where they should be. It was the room where my dear friend Doug passed away nearly two years ago. To me it will always and only be his room.

Stephanie and I to this day have never set foot in that particular room...only peering-in from the hall remembering our friend. He left this earth from that room. It's a special place for me as I know it is for his family who was with him in that room on that day.

Thankfully the image that comes to my mind is this...



...the way I remember him then and now: happy, focused, and taking in the beauty of the world below.

A little piece of inspiration to go along with a man and a memory like Doug.





P.S. - Stephanie is still doing well. She's having another minor surgery in the morning. I know you will be thinking of her as I know you always do...thank you so much.

Shark Boy

Shark Boy (as my girls know him) Taylor Lautner came to visit NieNie in the Burn Center today. How thoughtful of him to stop by.

Stephanie is doing great. She is walking around now and her goitre (not really but it looks like one) is healthy and taking. That's what we are calling the new piece of skin on Stephanie's neck, previously known as hunchie.

She's still on a lot of medicine right now so she acts kind of loopy. But loopy is better than pain. Oh I love her...I know you do too.

Thanks.

Love, Christian

Sympathy Sickness

Today I'm feeling a little sympathy sickness for Stephanie...poor girl. Except for me, she's not wanting to have any visitors (although she loves you). But today I woke up sick, sick, sick, and I can't be there with her. Ug.


(haven't unpacked yet)

I called Stephanie and we talked on the phone for a few minutes. Later I had to laugh because our conversation was totally incoherent; she's medicated and I had a fever. I don't even remember what we said, but I'm sure it was classic.

The Weekend Road Trip

(somewhere near lake powell)

This weekend I (Mr. Nielson that is, not Nienie) flew to Utah and drove back to AZ in less than 24 hours. I'm gathering our chicks to Arizona as we anticipate Stephanie's release from the hospital and the imminent summer break.




When Stephanie and I came down to AZ we were a little unprepared to stay for surgery. So, I picked up some essentials from home plus a couple of boys and 1 dog. The girls will stay in UT and finish up school for another week.


(pit stop)

Stephanie continues to do well. She had an unexpected "touch-up" surgery on Saturday, about the time the boys and I were driving across the Glen Canyon Dam. I felt so guilty not being there.



As soon as we arrived at Grandmary's house I tucked in the boys and headed back to her hospital bedside.
The best part is, she didn't even remember me being gone...yessss.

Here and There

My sweetheart is back. After a 14 hour surgery she is exhausted. But everything went well and her scarred neck has been replaced thanks to a friendly organ donor we used to know as "hunchie"...who is now gone.


(Here...)

Dr. L showed me pics of the surgery and I am speechless at the skill and technique of these physicians, and by the majesty of God's human body. It is a beautiful thing...absolutely beautiful.
Today is a day of thanksgiving: thanks to you for your faith and prayers, thanks to good doctors/nurses, thanks to family and friends in times of crisis.


(...There)

I am most of all thankful to be in the same room with my sweetheart again, to be able to talk to her, see her pretty eyes, listen to her soft voice, and hear her sweet words.
We made it to the weekend...couldn't have done it without you.

Love, Christian

A New Neck

(old neck...sometime BC)

At 9:00am this morning, they wheeled my sweetheart into the OR for the big surgery. She laid in her bed just outside the OR doors where I said goodbye for the next 8-10 hours. I said what I always say at that point: "I'll be right here when you wake up."
As we embraced my heart reached out and touched hers (it really did) and she knows that I love her. A kiss and a cry later I am back in her room in the AZ Burn Center waiting it out...and praying.
I hope you will do the same for my sweet Stephanie.

Love, Christian

I may be here for a while.

(me and the children in The Maricopa Burn Center, Phoenix Jan 2010)

Mr. Nielson, hunchie and I flew down to Phoenix for round 4 of treatments.
Upon viewing hunchie, Dr.L. said it looked liked it was in the first few stages of infection.
So, he told me that I had to stay in Phoenix to do the actual procedure.
What?
After a few minutes, I looked at him in shock.
Wait, what? Stay? Here? Today? Surgery...??

Just hours ago, Mr. Nielson and I woke up and went to the airport like we do every Tuesday.
Except this time, we are not coming home.
And I only packed my purse.
No pills, clothes, toothbrush or bumble hair products.
The children all expected us to be home, and we are not. And, I have serious guilt.
On top of guilt, I am really nervous about the actual procedure.

I am being admitted on Wednesday and the 8-10 hour procedure will be on Thursday.
I may possibly be comatose after the surgery becuase the procedure is a very intricate one.
(but I am praying hard that it wont).
But if I do, I am sure I will be headed to the same place I went last time I was in a coma.
And that is not half bad. In fact, I am actually looking forward to it.
Mr. Nielson just wants me to make sure I come back.
I plan on it.

I'd rather be napping.

(View 32,000 feet up)

Probably as you read this, I am on a Southwest flight bound for PHX.
My appointment with Dr. L. is today, and hopefully my last for a while.
My expansion is coming along and major surgery is planned for June 8th but,
I have been having some pain back there and Dr. L. is worried we may have to
operate sooner than expected.
I pray its not so.
So, I leave for Phoenix today (and maybe) for longer than I expected.
My ideal day would include not being admitted to the hospital and flying back home.
Actually, my ideal day would be laying in my bed next to Nicholas.
Doesn't his nap look so wonderful?

(Nicholas Jones on my bed-the spring wind blows from outside the window.)






****
Other :
Questions answered right here.
1. The bike in "My New Life" video is a Madson. You can find them here.
(the best purchase you will ever make...seriously)
2. Dear________, You sent me $20.00 in the mail to cover the cost of a book. I can't remember who it was.
I am very embarrassed to share this news. Please forgive me, and send me an e-mail.
3. Nicholas' shirt is from here.

Carry on.

Change

Mr. Nielson, the children and I rode our bikes to my Parents house on Fir Avenue.
It is a tradition we have been doing every Sunday since the Mr. and I were married.
And now it is going to end.
I will be in Arizona for treatments and surgery and Mom and Dad will be moving and living in St. Louis for three years. My brother Matt and his family will move in the
Clark house on Fir Avenue the beginning of June.
****
Dad made dinner tonight
(the usual beets, cheese, vegetable melody, and of course Jell-o among other stuff).
Then he passed out licorice, taffy and told us stories about his recent trip to Lake Powell with his brothers and sisters.
Then I looked around the house.
Then I felt really sad.
Why do things have to change? I love them just the way they are.
****

(Andrew and Luke.....Lucy and Betsy with Drew)

So I sucked in the tears and
told my niece Lindsay about when my boyfriend in high school used to throw rocks at my window at night. It will be her room now.
Her boyfriends will do the same.
Then I saw the swing Mr. Nielson made out back
for my dad's 65th birthday.
It will still hang in the large chestnut tree.

(My house on Fir Avenue)

It was hard to admit that change is good. But it is.
It is vital to our growth and I am aware of that.
I just feel like my childhood is fading away.
I really loved my childhood.
****

(Me and Mr. Nielson...check out my new long locks)

My weekend was low-key.
My back was sore most of the week, maybe infected, which means I will have surgery sooner than expected. I hope not.
Then, I went to the optometrist because my right eye was really blurry and painful.
Doctor says I have a Corneal Ulcer.
Perfect timing.
Then I got my hair fixed all up at I'm Beautiful salon.
Shannon did my hair while I sat in the chair- eyes closed.
I think I fell asleep a few times.
I love it there.
Good news, school is almost out.
And the other good news is, I will get a new neck soon.

(It's like Christmas, and Dr. L. is Santa Claus).

Potential

(Nicholas jumping on the trampoline. That IS a fake knife)

Today I took hunchie to Target.
I took Nicholas and Oliver too.
I bought some new bathroom towels, and light bulbs (among other "stuff")
After I felt dizzy.
I went home and read some wonderful mail from you.
I felt special, loved and beautiful- what a combination that is!
Then I got a few letters that told me I was vain and ugly. What an awful combination that is!
(Oh, and one that suggest I test Nicholas for something or other...)
I have been getting nasty comments on my Nie and You blog.
But people are so good, I have a hard time believing them.
There is goodness in every single one of us. If we dig deep its there.
Its called the Light of Christ.
Its in me, you and your worst enemy.
We all have baggage to claim and it may be heavy or light, but God is always there.
The good news is, you have always been a son/daughter of God, and you always will be.
This, my friends should give you the confidence you need to get through anything.
What potential we have.
Do something, be someone that is good and beautiful.
This accident has taught me a thing or two about what it means to be truly happy.
Its one of the greatest lessons I could ever learn.

Happy Weekend!
-Nie

I stayed in my PJ's all day long.

(me + hunchie = new neck)

I can't do a whole lot now that hunchie has invaded my life.
In fact, I stayed in my PJ's all day long and gave Mr. Nielson a list.
But, I declare that anyone who has a hunchie can stay in their PJ's for the rest of their life-
AND write honey-do lists too.

P.S.
I need a cupcake.
P.P.S.
In the background of my photo are the lilacs from here.
I steal them every year.

I got expanded and laughed pretty hard.

(I crashed seconds from walking into my door)

Mr. Nielson and I walked into our dark house just as we had left it hours ago that morning.
The children all snug asleep as my handsome nephews and
one adorable niece were there to watch guard.

****
Hunchie has tripled in size, and I can certainly feel it.
(and I am sure you can certainly see it!)
It is beginning to become very uncomfortable and heavy.
This also means it wont be long before they operate.
In fact we talked dates...mid June is the verdict. Keep your fingers crossed.
****
After a cheerful visit from Dr. L. (who told me in his very charming Italian) that I was ugly and needed some work done-or something like that. Then I punched his leg and told him he was a brat. Then he explained to me that it really means something nice. He even went so far as to say it meant something quite endearing-
that's the last time I bring him cookies to work every week.
****
After the expansion we met with the in-laws and we saw 'Babies'-a new movie out.
It was a perfect treat for Mothers Day. Go and see it, but beware it will make you super super baby-hungry. I think I could kill for one-but not really, but really. Kind of.
And, you will see a lot of boobies.
No biggie.
Maybe not see the movie for the first time with your father-in-law.
(I love you Boss!)
Just a suggestion.
Its pretty harmless though.
Favorite part- when African baby poops on mothers knee, and mother wipes it into her skin as moisturizer.
And when the Mongolian baby plays in the middle of a field with Oxen.
Least favorite part- The United Sates Parents. They make Motherhood/fatherhood as nerdy as it gets. Also, they portray the USA parents as if we have no clue what we are doing.
Other least favorite part- No Scandinavian baby. They certainly do make the cutest babies.
****
Mr. Nielson and I went to a nice Mexican joint for dinner after.
Mr. Nielson remarked I must be hungry because I was going to town on my burro- and I then reminded him that I was now eating for two.
****
Then in the car on the way home from the airport, Mr. Nielson was singing the dumbest song on the radio trying to keep himself awake. We changed the words around a little to make us laugh AND stay awake. Here is what we came up with:
Lady Antebellum, to song "Need you now"
"Its a quarter after one, I heard a little drum, pa rum pum pum pum".
Try, it- its so funny.
or,
Try saying "Lunch" for any song that says love.
for example: (to Faith Hill, Lets make Love (or lunch) song:
"Lets make lunch, from now on, until all our strength is gone...."

You see where I am going with this, right?
Now I am exhausted and going to bed.

Kisses-
Nie

Braids

I felt a little better today.
Having the flu is the worst. It really is.
I finally decided to get my sick body up and get in the shower, but
Mr. Nielson had beat me to it. No problem, I just hopped in and joined him.

Anyway, after the shower I asked Mr. Nielson to please braid my hair.
Mr. Nielson always says yes to anything I need have done to my hair.
But when I asked for braids he gave me a very confused look and said:
Braids? I don't know how to do those
Then I said:
Yes you do, you are a boy scout
and he said:
But we didn't learn how to braid women's hair.
Then I reminded him that most of the manliest cowboys probably had to braid their horses tails once and awhile.
NO WAY he voiced.
followed by:
No way did John Wayne braid his horsed tail, no way did Zorro, or Wyatt Earp, or Butch Cassidy braid their horsed tails either-that's so girly.
Then I said:
I bet The Sundance kid braided his horses tails.
In fact I know he did because he was a romantic.
And romantic men do things like that-just like what you are doing right now.
It's hot.
Then he tied a rubber band around my braids and I took a big long nap.

****
Back to Phoenix today for another hunchie treatment... 2 more to go!

The mothers day that wasn't.

(The girls before church)

I threw up on Mothers day. About 20 times every 15 minutes.
It was pretty bad, but even worse that hunchie had to come along. (double ouch).
It reminded me the last time I threw up, (which was a year ago)I had just gotten my new compression mask to wear to bed. (think this) I woke up in a fright and ran to the toilet, my awkward painful fingers couldn't take my mask off. So, shamelessly, I barfed while wearing it.
Try (if you dare) to put some nylons over your head then leave them on and then throw up. Imagine where the vomit goes.....

-End of description-

****

So, Mothers day was a bomb.
I still have my Williams and Sonoma gift all wrapped up waiting for me on my kitchen table.
I went in the kitchen while my family was at church. I saw my gift and then next to it was last nights pizza I barely made it to the bathroom in time to make it in the toilet.
Mr. Nielson told me that we could pretend mothers day was whenever I feel better.
Then he wiped off the throw-up in my hair.
****
Last Mothers Day, I was just home from the hospital. I received the greatest gift ever then. And I didn't even have to open it up.
****
I love all the Mothers of the world. And that means YOU, even if you aren't a "mother" of children per say- but you are Mothers...Women just are- no matter what.

(Afternoon lunch)

To mothers everywhere!

(me preforming Motherly duties. Photo by Justin Hackworth)

Happy Mothers Day all!

If you want to treat yourself today, and you live in Utah.
Head over to The Sweet Tooth fairy for a free cupcake.
I'll see you there!
VaNiella cupcake here I come!
Oh la la.

A long week

(Jane and Nie on Easter 2010)

Its Friday...are you so excited? I am. I have no plans, but that's what is so exciting about it.
Sleeping in (what am I talking about, I sleep in everyday...)
no school, pancakes, children, church.
Right now, Jane is sitting on my floor screaming and my canteen is empty.
Its so awful when I feel like that...tired, pain, exhaustion.
I think Jane feels it too-nothing a weekend wont cure for the both of us.
****
Also,
Check Holiday with Matthew Mead today to see if you are the
lucky winner for the $50 gift-card to Anthropologie.

Lucky girl

(Me and Mr. Nielson on southwest PHX to SLC)

I want to first thank you for viewing the video I was honored to be in.
I so enjoyed reading your comments
(even though a few peeps gave me the thumbs down on youtube...ha)
It was truly a spiritual experience sharing my feelings with you in that type of setting.
I give all the credit to God...all of it.
Again, thank you again for the sweet, upbeat, and encouraging messages I received!
I am a lucky, lucky girl.
****
Speaking of Lucky, Mr. Nielson snapped a few shots of me peacefully sleeping in his arms on the airplane on the way home from my hunchie expansion.
I love that guy.
Talk about lucky.
I am waiting for him to finish his nightly walk with Jimmy and come tuck me into bed before doing the dishes or something very productive that needs done around the house.
He is the man.



***
PS...Stacy and Andrew never fail to send me flowers on Cinco De Mayo.
They are the best.

My new life video

(me working on 'my new life' short video)

I was honored to be a part of a wonderful short video.
Please check it out.

****
or you can check the movie out here too.
****
Also, Mindy Gledhill is the sweet voice in the background singing
"All about your heart".
It has been my very favorite song she has written.
She sang it to me and Mr. Nielson after I was released from the hospital.
It will be on her new album coming out this summer.
(Don't worry I will let you all know when it does)
****
And to read the beautiful speech given by Jeffrey R. Holland
at the end of the video about our beloved prophet Joseph Smith in full, go here.

Linda

I sat outside with Nicholas and Oliver today in the early morning Spring sun.
It was energizing!
My picnic blanket was made by a sweet boy's mother whom I knew in High School.
Linda.
It was one of the sweetest gifts I have ever been given.
I love quilts.
I love the colors, fabrics and the never-ending designs.
Linda's blanket was blocked in pinks and browns.
A favorite color coordination of mine.

I sat on the blanket today and pondered.
I am preparing for another treatment of "hunchie" today in Phoenix.
Page is taking the children and Mr. Nielson and I will again eat bagels for breakfast on a Southwest flight bound for Dr. L's office.
Hunchie will get that much bigger and that much more uncomfortable.
I tried to do all the household shopping and cleaning because I fear when I return, I will be down and out.
(in fact I am counting on it)

I will have to wear big hoodies and yoga pants...not that I am complaining too much, but it is nice to look put-together most days.
I am certain that dressing each day with one accessory is an
instant and definite anti-depressant.
Try it.

Thanks again Linda!

I love you and so....

This Mothers Day, I want one of you lucky women to have a reason to go into Anthropologie. (which to me, is heaven on earth).
Maybe you could pick up a few latte bowls or a darling apron to showcase your motherhood.
I am teaming up with Matthew Mead and the gang over at the Holiday magazine.
( I get to be involved). To give away a $50 gift-card to you! Because we love you!
Enter in your name at a chance in winning a $50 gift card at Anthropologie.
HERE.
Also, be sure you order your Holiday with Matthew Mead magazine now.
You can only buy them via on-line, so please get one.
(And not just because I am going to be in it, but because Matthew is a genius and you will love his holiday ideas...or because I am going to be in it)

Here are the rules and information about the entry:

The contest ends Thursday night and the winner will be announced on Friday.
Check back here for the winner on May 7th, 2010.

You can earn two extra entries by purchasing a copy of HOLIDAY between Monday and Thursday. All you have to do is leave us a note in the
comment section of Monday’s post.

Oh, and P.S.
I love you!

Oh, and P.P.S.
Check out this lovely series of photos for Motherhood.
I am honored to start it off.

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Thanks for your interest in my blog CuisineNie.
This cooking blog of mine is back to attack.
Go check it out.

Happy Cooking!